Genevieve
	Waking	Sleeping	Sign	Repose	Wish
	The gleam in your eyes is so familiar a gleam...

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lots of random thoughts
2001-02-08 - 14:01:30

Dammit Courtnay!

Okay, so I just read B's diary and man is it deep and thoughtful. Me? I feel like the Medicine Head commercial come to life. And I'm not on that many drugs. I'd go home, but after Jan. I'm a little short on leave and my cowrker Rob's wife burnt herself somehow pretty bad so he had to take her to the emergency room. That means we are a bit short staffed, but not terribly. Poor Rob left in such a rush that he forgot his oatmeal in the microwave. It exploded and ran all over, so I spent a little while cleaning off the container and sticking it back in the fridge and cleaning the microwave. yay.

The reason I damn Courtnay is that I think she got me sick. Well it's the only logical conclusion since she was feeling crappy yesterday and is out today. blah.

Now for those of you who may be a bit confused, there are three Courtney's in my life/world that I am aware of. First there is Courtney/Arielle in the SCA. She is an angel. She is one of the greatest people god ever placed on this planet and I consider myself lucky to have ever met her, much less been a distant friend. Second is Courtney/Cussata. This is Galmr's female squire, ex-wife of Prince Havorc and all around crazy woman. She is referred to as the "Bad Courtney" around here. Then there is this basitan of light, my co-worker Courtnay. Notice her parents were smoking something because her name is spelled funny at the end. We make sure to emphasize the NAY part of her name. In my opening statement, this is who I was referring to. I swear it is she who spread this pestilence that I am currently fighting. Tylenol Cold and Vitamin C are my trusty sword and shield. The thing is that I had hoped that after the January that I was subjected to I would be in perfect health for the rest of the year. sigh.

Since I have no original thoughts at this moment, some would argue any moments, I figure I'll pilfer or elaborate on B's post.

On the venus/mars quote, I have to totally agree. My world is a very happy and silly place and it is obvious that the rest of humanity doesn't get to a place like mine often. I know for a fact that my planet doesn't match anyone else's male or female. Roland does occasionally visit though and we share a brain. Think of me as the loud obnoxious side and Roland as the quiet, mischievious, trouble making side. Trust me. Oh, and while I heard the Mars/Venus book is really good, I think they have taken this a little far. I mean, come on! They had a very short lived stage play that only lasted one month. There is this dumb daytime TV show hosted by Cybil Shepherd,Moonlighting, oh how the mighty have fallen. There are Mars/Venus books on friendships, relationships, dealing with your family, dealing with your dog, it's gotten out of hand. Sadly America can't resist a collection of shit, be in beanie babies or dilbert stuff.

I love the movie "Dogma". I need to sit and watch it again. I have a good idea.

On the whole peerage thing, it's a weird dynamic. Some people are Peers before they ever were recognized as one by the SCA. They do so much and so well, and give so much of themselves and rarely seem to run out, be their speciality arts, fighting or service, or a mixture of the three. Ceridwen is one of these people in my mind. Then there are some folks who, by being made a Peer in the SCA, grow into that born-Peer type of person. They learn by the fact that others have confidence in them and esteem for them, that they are worthy and begin to teach and show and be an example for those of us who aren't born-Peers. Then there are a select few that seem to never live up to their Peerage. They have done all of the things on the check list, they haven't royally pissed anyone off, etc, but they don't seem to grow in a positive way. They may be hyper critical of others since they can't rise above. They may be childish or petty. But even though they have been given the SCA Peerage, for whatever it is worth in the real world, they never actually reach acting in a Peer-like manner. Did any of this make sense? I'm not a born-Peer. I don't have any great talents to speak of other than a propensity to run on and on and on. :) I'd like to be the second type one of these days, but this will take time, and lots of effort and if I never reach it, then my world will not end. I hope to never be the last kind. I know that I can be rather catty at times. I know that I am lazy, and disorganized to some extent. I know that often my pride and my self-esteem fall over themselves, and I get all tangled up. I know that I probably bore some folks to tears, but I hope never to be condescending, or petty, or take any joy in the failures of others.

This can also go to Royal Peers to an extent. I believe, while some may not, that Royal Peers deserve their accolade and station. Running this kingdom is not an easy job. And while it is true that some folks have done a better job than others, I don't think that anyone has completely failed. I know that while Lady Jane may just be sleeping with Fighter Joe to become Queen, once she travels that path, she has worked her tail off, or become really good at delegating. I'm also a Royalist, a Monarchist, I am not one of those people who would dare take a break in the SCA based on who was on the throne. Ironically no one has truly let me down either. I've never had a set of Crowns that I could not deal with and admire their techniques, especially since I've been in office.

Now to completely get off track, let's look at Anton. I personally think very highly of Anton, even if he teases me mercilessly. As the Crown he is efficient, and pragmatic, and he takes problems into his own hands, always looks to better the kingdom in some way, great or small. This is my second time being a great officer while Anton has been king. He is a joy to watch work and process. There are some folks here in the north who think Anton is the antichrist or something. They just don't see. There are many people who say what Anton thinks or believes who have never talked to the man. Anton may be a bit of a redneck. He may not practice the most period arts and work to make the SCA a true medieval society. But don't you dare underestimate Anton. He knows more than you think he does. He is a great leader, why else would so many follow. I may never be Doug's friend and throw him a birthday party, but I dig the guy. He is not without, as some may have you believe.

Sheesh, onto my next and last thought. While I'm not too big into this whole award thing measuring my self worth, there is one award in the SCA that I truly aspire to. This is not the Laurel or Pelican, but the Queen's Award of Courtesy. I know that I fall short in the category, and I could do better. I am not one of these completely gracious people. Ceridwen, Susie, Roland, Andrew, Arielle, Forgal. There is a great difference between myself and these people and it is not merely the award they hold, but their actions to warrant being granted such an award. One of these days, I will know that I am cool if I can aspire to be more like those mentioned above.

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